I’m no stranger to mistakes when it comes to e-mail newsletters and send-outs to readers. Many times it’s a misspelled word or broken link, but it can sometimes be a faulty send-out list or a spam word in the subject line that shrinks my response rate.

In a recent tongue-in-cheek post by Andrew Kordek at Deliverability.com, he explores how to die a quick death by e-mail campaign in nine “easy” steps. Some of his “tips” include:

Email Overload -- Customers are just waiting to hear from us, aren’t they? Go ahead and send them an e-mail every day until they contact you. They won’t mind.

All About You -- “You are the king/queen of email marketing,” Kordek quips. “Your subscribers need to understand this and you need to communicate that on a regular basis.”

Reinvent The Wheel -- All those best-practices blog and white paper sessions you sat in on and listened to, throw what you’ve learned out the window. You don’t need to better your program.

Live Large -- “Remember this: The bigger your list, the bigger the payoff!”

The list above of course contains ridiculous statements of what NOT to do with your e-mail marketing campaign. But Kordek really has fun with it. Check out the full article here. Do the opposite of what he says and thrive.